Guide to Conduct and...

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Guide to Conduct and Ceremony

Appendix: Ceremonial Texts

Part Two: Ceremonial Texts for the Formalities concerning Family Affairs

20. Dharma Discourse at a Wedding Ceremony (1)

As a marriage is an important matter in life, today's ceremony is an important celebration for both of you. On this occasion, I give you several dharma instructions which you can keep and use in the future. So I hope that you will keep them in mind and put them into practice.

1. Harmony is a fundamental spirit in marriage, and a marriage without it would be of no value. Therefore both of you should make efforts to keep harmony with each other throughout all of your lives.
2. Fidelity is a fundamental value in the promises between people, and promises without it would be of no effect. Therefore both of you should keep fidelity throughout all of your lives.
3. Diligence is a fundamental asset in economic living, there would be no basis for independent living without it. Therefore both of you should make efforts in frugality throughout all of your lives.
4. Faith is a fundamental requirement in spiritual living, you would have no guide with which you will steer your way toward the eternal world without it. Therefore both of you should have a firm faith throughout all of your lives.
5. Practice is a fundamental element in cultivating character, there would be no improvement in human living without it. Therefore both of you should not neglect practice throughout all of your lives.
6. Morality is a fundamental track in the human world. You would have no right to participate in society without it. Therefore both of you should respect morality throughout all of your lives.
7. Requital of grace is a fundamental responsibility, and those who do not know grace are none other than animals. Therefore both of you should make efforts in requital of grace throughout all of your lives.
8. Public well-being is a fundamental feature in human life. One cannot say human life is intelligent without it. Therefore both of you should do your best for the public’s well-being throughout all of your lives.

How can we say that these simple principles define the way to living a proper life? Still, I mention the essential dharmas above because you should not make light of them, and instead realize their value and encourage each other to follow these principles by doing what is good and forgoing what is evil, regardless of their size..
Though everyone has a kind friend, the friendship between husband and wife is the strongest, so if that friendship encourages goodness, then goodness will return easily, but if that friendship instigates evil, then evil will surely result.
Therefore, as you live together throughout your lives, you should encourage goodness in each other, and not let your friendship become an instrument of evil.
In addition, it is easy to become rash or lacks in behavior which brings about resentment between close friends, but it is important to remember to respect and love one another and to build good affinities that harmonize your relationship for the future, rather than those that push you apart.
Thus, I earnestly ask that, with the harmony of couple, you plant the seed for peace within our community, and make the happiness of your family a foundation to our society.