Guide to Conduct and...

Dictionary

Guide to Conduct and Ceremony

Part 1. General Propriety

Chapter 7. Speaking and Responding

Section 2. Appropriate Manners in Speaking

1. Language is used in different ways when using it among seniors and elders or juniors and subordinates, but the general pirit of language usage is to be respectful to one another. One should not be careless in showing respect to others.
2. One must speak appropriately according to the time and place, and according to the occasion, with no foolish or rude words.
3. One must not use craftiness or sophistries, but always speak honestly and sincerely, and not assume an affected manner.
4. One should speak with faith and justice and not use double‐tongued.
5. Always speak simply and clearly; state exactly the main point, and say what comes first and what comes later.
6. One should always speak courteously and peacefully, without bad language or harsh words.
7. Always speak generously and magnanimously, without roughness.
8. One must always, in speaking, safeguard ethics and lead people to conduct good relationships.
9. One should always speak in such a manner that one's words open the way to progress for others.
10. One should always use honorific titles and terms of respect to an elder; and should use appropriate levels of title or name to call to seniors, equals, and juniors. In addition, one should use appropriate forms of title and name in speaking for and about ourselves.
11. Always use words of respect and courtesy to an elder who is generally respected by the public even if that person is not directly one’s teacher. Use that person's dharma title or pen name (if the person has one) and use any official titles of a person who is in a government post; but one should do this neither excessively nor too little according to the conventions of the time.
12. One should not use insincere or arrogant words to a person of lower position. A person should use an appropriate title or term of respect in speaking to someone in a lower position. When a person refers to someone in a lower position, one should use an appropriate term of respect.
13. Especially between men and women, honorific words should be used.